


Who Farted

by Purple_is_life



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time
Genre: Brotherly Bonding, Family Feels, Farts, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Hyrule is a good boy, Linked Universe (Legend of Zelda), Someone save Four, Time is the best dad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:08:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24333364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Purple_is_life/pseuds/Purple_is_life
Summary: Hyrule initiates a good old fashion fart competition winners take home glory, by mistake.Brotherly bonding ensues, its family time.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 66





	Who Farted

**Author's Note:**

> Blame my dog for this monstrosity, and if this is your kink I made another crackfic awhile back.

Hyrule had not meant to start biological warfare amongst his brothers, but after he tripped and ripped a nasty fart, Wind had taken upon himself to dominate the group. He remembers in great detail the start of their downfall. They had just set up camp and gotten comfortable when Hyrule had returned with extra kindling for the fire before they would have the dreaded watch scheduling. He had meant to just plop on down next to Legend when his knees gave out, and he dropped ripping a fart he had been brewing. He was mortified when the group howled with laughter but was taken back by Winds stern expression. "You call that a fart Rule?" the younger boy scoffed. The group raised a brow at Sailor's decree and were perplexed when Wind bunkered down on himself, straining intensely with his eyes shut when the boy ripped a mean one. "Goddess be damn Wind," their Captain gagged, "warn someone before fumigating," earning shrieks of laughter out of the pirate. "Damn, did you shit yourself, looked like it hurt" Legend wheezed. Hyrule didn't feel as embarrassed then, and the group tickled with amusement seemingly regressed back into children. "Let me you show you how its done," Twilight smirked before lifting his leg a little and let his cheeks clap in Wild direction. The group lost it, as Wild howled in disgust faking gagging noises. Wild never one to back down from a challenge, ripped a massive, hardy fart that would make his mentor proud, back at Twilight. There were laughs all around as their feral gremlin dared anyone to top him. "Four it's your turn," Wind declared smugly. "Ah! I can't fart on command like you animals," the blacksmith snickered, wiping tears from his eyes. "Warriors make me proud," Wild hollered at the man. Their Captain smirked before grounding himself. "Hold on, I think I got one," breathing deeply through his nose, and he pushed. Belching loudly, the group booed but laughed none the less as he groaned disappointed in himself. "I've got one" Sky raise his hand proudly. Eagar, the group, quiets down enough for Sky to stand. The group sat in quiet confusion when Sky sat back down, smiling pleased with himself… when the smell hit them. "OH, My Hylia! Sky, what crawled up your ass and died!" Legend dry heaved. Hyrule felt his eye-watering as his stomach clenched uncomfortably. It was around this time Hyrule knew he had made a terrible mistake.  
Time sat back with his eyes shut, brows pained as he tried to keep his own stomach contents down. Ripping his one good eye back open, a fierce determination came over their leader's face. Twilight visibly shuttered, "Old Man no…please." "Sky, you are to be blamed for what happens next," the elder hisses mischievously. The group looked to their leader shook when the old man flexes his upper torso with the vigor of a young man out for glory and claps his cheeks so hard the stump he sat on seemed to rumble underneath him. The smell waved around the camp like a deadly miasma that spoke of death. Legend unable to take the exposure barreled in the bushes next to him, expelling the tarnished goods within his stomach. Hyrule quickly moved to hold legends hat out of the way as he heaved. Looking back at the group alarmed, he saw Twilight holding Wild comfortingly, warning him not to breathe with his mouth or he'll throw up too. Sky's face turned a sheen green, contorted almost as if in pain, and drooled as pinprick tears streamed down his face. Four laid twitching on his side near-comatose as his eyes flickered colors wildly. Warriors always quick to think ahead had tightly wrapped his scarf around his nose and mouth faired better than did his little Sailor. The boy had shoved out of their Captain's grip when he had attempted to shield him from the worst of it, to take the fumes like a trooper. "That's All you got Old Man" their Sailor whimpered. Time, the mad man sat tall in this throne, "Is that a challenge or a request boy" the elder smirked. "Wind STOP, he's a sworn brother of the Goron's!" Twilight hissed with his hackles raised in fear. This earned a wicked evil laugh from their leader "you came to this council a novice and self-proclaimed master in this art and it's my sworn duty as a Goron brother to punish you" the older howled. When the group finally came down from their high and Time could no longer bare his own monstrosity they unanimously decided it was best move camp upwind.


End file.
